Being HIV Positive

I’m sure many who read the title of this post paused for a second (or three) and either changed your perception of me or was jolted into a state of disbelief. So I’m not HIV positive. So what if I was? I don’t get the fuss. Okay, I understand the epidemic, yes, but I don’t quite our society remains stuck on stigma and stigmas of all sorts for that matter.

We are fixated with stigmas. We are fixated with all stigmas related to sex, pre-marital, outside marriage, ag just sex in general. You’d think we would grow more conscious about the negative effects of stigmas, not only as a nation but as global citizens, actually as human beings.

I would like to officially state that human beings have sex. It may seem p-r-e-t-t-y obvious to some people, but many people are shocked to hear this. Ok, let me repeat this. Human beings have sex. Let us move on- and delve on issues that would actually have an impact on the lives and ‘going concern’ of the human race.

Firstly, sex (and sometimes not the way we do it) is not a bad thing at all. It’s natural (All the old people are creeped out right now-just check). Let’s look at the problems with the bad side of sex. Now THERE’S a topic worth discussing. Believe you me, a topic too big for me to handle on my lonesome.

I’ll touch on 2 issues in this post i.e underage sex and teen pregnancy and  HIV/ AIDS.

Underage sex is bad. Ok, got that out of my system. Now that the emotional side is out I can say that reality and statistics available (and evidence of teenage pregnancies) clearly depict that young people and children are sexually active. Why? Where do they even get the idea to insert things into places they should not even be wondering about. Being inquisitive and experimentation is natural too, but there is a line to draw. Who draws the line though? And how thick is that line? Is that line currently in place in today’s society (considering the images and ideas portayed by the media about sex)? I think it’s important that we realize, as a concerned society, that maybe, just maybe, our focus of trying to stop Nicki Minaj and whoever else shake their ‘groove thing’, is only half the problem. The other sits with what we instill in the children through what we preach (and what we practice, ahem). We need to open some dialogue and talk about sex with the youth and not just the consequences. For goodness sake, we all know “a mommy and a daddy make a baby”. We need to talk about the feelings, the heat, “die warmte”, “die lekkerte”, the lies, the pain, the emotional roller coaster, the truth. Dammit. The truth. If you tell the truth, it will become more sacred. If something is understood and believed to be sacred- it is more likely to be respected.

So, like after you have sex, one bietjie (small bit of) sperm fertilizes an egg and then. BOOM. Sit Down. You’re (young) pregnant. Evidence that you were sexually active is very present. And in many cultures, it’s errrr, LATE for you. You dirty, you made a mistake, you had sex, but you give life. Go figure.

I think it just got controversial up in here.

Second blabber is about HIV/AIDS. Another serious topic- it’s safe to say it affects many of us personally. In our families, friends, or even you. It’s invisible- until it hits you. No one knows, but you, and suddenly, you don’t feel the same. Imagine living with a label. Oh, wait, we love doing that, labelling others. I forgot. Now, imagine living with this ‘dirty’ label which society gave you- and ever so gently tells you you’re going to die. I am just imagining- but I know that it’s nothing close to reality. How do you expect that person to seek support or help, just to deal with this ‘label’ and real fear to come out if we already sentence them to a death, social exclusion? Maybe it’s because I live with stigmas myself that I can understand the frustration.

I think to myself, “Hey he’s just HIV +, he is still the same person. She is lesbian, she is still awesome. She is pregnant. She still knows how to shake her biscuit on the dance floor (dance).” I don’t see the fuss. I don’t.

Call me dirty. Glad the title got your attention. Goes to show hey.

Miss Y

7 thoughts on “Being HIV Positive

  1. Saif Islam says:

    The blog is looking good, Yvette!

    But can you please get rid of “Just another site” from the top?

    Because it isn’t just another site. Thought-provoking stuff actually.


  2. Marieke says:

    I like what you wirte about sex talk. it is true. However there are many other things involved, especially in S.A. how many young women (girls) and young men (boys) do not have anyone who even talks to them about anything. no one asks how they are, what they are doing, what they feel. no love to be found anywhere.
    then, the best bet to feel love and closeness and feel worth attention is though having sex with someone who pretends to give all these things to you in return…. not mentioning all the other things you’ll get out of it.


  3. Yve's Corner says:

    @Saif- thanks for the time spent reading it! HHAHAH, i need 17 dollars and then i can get rid of that little phrase. For now, I call this home.
    @Marieke- look, it’s a complex topic. I was tackling the sex-specific issue. I do agree that one fundamental issue that we also need to tackle, which will relate a huge deal to this topic, is self-respect, confidence and owning who you are. It seems somewhat far fetched, or even too big to consider that someone in a township can own their future, it’s like one of those stories you hear about, one in a million. One out of the million who escaped the poverty trap. But it is a big job we got totackle, and we need to educate and empower the minds of the children. I fear that the previous generation have little influence now, so this generation and the next need to build on the foundations we can only set now. U feel me?


  4. pj kleinsmidt says:

    Nicely said, lol love the play between generalizing and stereotyping, both outwardly and inwardly, you clearly have a lot to say, would have liked you to separate the 2 though, even the 3rd topic #readingbetweenthelines, i feel that theres so much more to say, hey, good on you gonna use ur link to read the others, just read first 2 lines of wat are you before the comment link popped up, enjoy it, how does one start blogging or get a site to blog



    • Yve's Corner says:

      Thanks for the crit PJ. It’s so easy, i just googled which blogging platforms were available. I liked that the one i’m using ( had the look and feel of a website. Then again i see can also look amazing. it’s free. easy, just sign up. WordPress isn’t that user-friendly so I’m still learning. Research and choose what suits you. Oh, yeah it’s free. If you want to own the domain name, you pay about 17$ a year.


  5. Akhona Lunika says:

    …and what we practice, ahem! That just killed me! Yes my fwend, I agree 100% stigmas r endless! We cultured in & that’s what it is. Where I live, its not about “Who has HIV” its more Who doesn’t! Tht’s the more relevant question! & people with HIV realise that its better to keep quiet than be judged and shunned. Then you start seeing pimples, loss of weight then “we” make the diagnosis 🙂

    That’s what humans are about, they want to foster cliques, community founded on similarities & fearing difference & ridiculing failure (since their perfect kaloku)

    Mwha, enjoyed the blog sweets, keep up the good work. If not for the greater reach of dialogue & humanity… Atleast for me then 😛


    • Yve's Corner says:

      Shnoekempoodle. LOL. i agree with u 100 percent. Imagine that, people think they perfect. Eish, the way I aspire to be perfect and fall short on a daily basis. But, i am learning to accept it. BUT, not only for that reason, we should not be judging. I think we are so much wiser as human beings, yet, we stay stuck in our backward mentalities. Can we only blame so-called human nature? Or maybe its just habit, a comfort zone, if you will.

      Ahem. I’m so glad you liked it. Send me the link to your blog, wanna put it up on my ‘For interesting sake’ section. And i think the blog is for my sanity’s sake- hahhaa- i have too many thoughts in m head. People can read into it what they like. 🙂

      Mwah. missing you my friend.


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